You ever sit there listening to music and it puts you in the mood to write? Well it happened to me this evening while listening to Rag’n’Bone Man. So here I am.

It’s been a week. Thought for sure I had finally found a job even if for a couple months till the end of the year, it was something. Then I get the email that they’re proceeding with someone else. I’ve received a variation of this message far too often over the last 21 months. They were kind enough to let me know that I was really strong on the data side but not strong enough on the project management side. Even went so far as to say that they’d love to have me on the team if a role more fitting opened up. Cool, thanks.

When is it my turn?

It’s hard to not let the discouragement start seeping its way into my thoughts. I’ve tried to avoid it after every denial, but it’s getting progressively harder. I’m not entirely sure what I’m supposed to do. I’m working on getting a project management certificate but now I’m beginning to wonder if that’s going to even help at all. Does it even matter if it’s not some certificate that costs hundreds or thousands of dollars to obtain? I don’t know. I’ve got only 6 modules left, I guess I’ll find out eventually.

I miss being around people. I miss being a part of conversations. I miss high-fives. I miss hugs. I miss laughing.